


Were you raised in a barn?

by Experimental_Muse



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Batfamily (DCU), Batfamily (DCU) Shenanigans, Fluff, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-27 19:54:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21124319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Experimental_Muse/pseuds/Experimental_Muse
Summary: Just a normal day at Wayne Manor





	Were you raised in a barn?

**Author's Note:**

> Edited 3/23/20  
Formerly my Everyday Shenanigans collection that I decided to split into individual fics. The second part has been posted separately if you're looking for it!

“Damian?”

“Yes, Father?”

“What’s wrong with this picture?”

“Absolutely nothing.”

“Try again.”

“My bed is not made.”

“Damian, how did you even get Batcow up here?”

His son hugged the cow tighter, “She was lonely and needed a change of scenery.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

The scene itself was actually quite impressive, the cow was sitting on a pile of pillows Damian had stolen from throughout the manor. Titus was laying next to her with Alfred the cat in Damian’s lap. A canopy of blankets had been constructed rather expertly over them. Then he noticed something was off. Bruce squinted, “Where’s Jerry?”

His youngest looked down, almost dejected, “He did not wish to stay with us and I will not keep him here against his will.”

“So you set him loose?” his son nodded. 

“In the manor…” Damian did not see the problem with that.

Before Bruce could run through a mental list of where the bird might be, there was a loud shriek from across the manor. An irate Tim could be heard making his way to Damian’s room. 

“THERE BETTER BE A GOOD EXPLANATION FOR WHY YOUR OVERGROWN CHICKEN WAS TEARING APART MY EVIDENCE BOARD OR I SWEAR TO WHATEVER GOD IS LISTENING-“ the tirade quickly cut off as Tim made it to the room and gaped at the scene inside. 

Bruce glanced into the hall and could see the bird in question pecking at some molding, with Jason creeping up behind it. This was going to end well. 

After a few more cautious steps Jason lunged at the bird. It let out a squawk and proceeded to smack him in the face with its wing and bite him. The scuffle was cut short by jerry taking off down the stairs, his son following close behind it. 

“Fucking overgrown sack of feathers,” Jason muttered while Damian ran past Tim and his father. 

“If you hurt my bird I will beat you with one of your own books!”

“I think we should be more worried about the bird hurting him,” Tim smirked as Jerry bit Jason again. Batcow came up beside Bruce like she wanted to watch the commotion. He absently patted her and wondered what he was going to tell Alfred. 

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and reactions are greatly appreciated.


End file.
